Several months ago, I brought myself to read through James Robinson’s brilliant Starman series. With its great supporting cast, the character Mikaal Tomas stuck out to me. One of the many superheroes to once call himself Starman, Mikaal turned against his conquering alien race and sided with Earth. Eventually, this led to the extermination of his kind and the truth that Mikaal was the last of his people. This made me realize how overused this idea was. So many aliens in the DC Universe were the last of their kind. Other than Mikaal, we have Superman, Martian Manhunter, Lobo and even Kilowag.

I got the feeling that these guys need their own story based on this. When I came across DC Universe: Last Sons at the local Barnes and Noble and saw that this was essentially what I was asking for, I realized I had to read it. Even without Mikaal and Kilowag there, I was still interested. Besides, it was about time I read a book that didn’t have pictures in it.

By the way, this is filled with spoilers. If you want a review that doesn’t tell you that Xemtex’s robot friend dies, go here. If you take that guy’s word for it, continue.

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(This is a rewritten message board post from Something Awful’s Batman’s Shameful Secret. It was good, so I dragged it from the depths and rewrote it.)

“Why I Like All-Star Batman & Robin the Boy Wonder”
by little david brothers, age 22

Both All-Star Superman and All-Star Batman & Robin the Boy Wonder are takes on classic heroes that feature full creative freedom. It’s a chance for these guys to tell the Bats/Supes story they wanted to tell and how they wanted.

The Miller/Lee Batman is different from the Loeb/Sale, Loeb/Lee, Azzarello/Risso, Brubaker/McDaniel, Dixon/Grummett Batman, but it is still recognizably Batman. It’s Batman spun for self-conscious comedy. It’s a guy in a batsuit who isn’t crazy, I don’t think, but would like for people to think that he’s crazy, so he acts crazy. “I ate rats BY CHOICE SO HE BETTER EAT RATS TOO!” That’s hilarious. He’s trying so hard to be a hardcase that everyone around him, or at least Alfred (who’s known him for years and is probably tired of his self-important crap) to Dick Grayson (who has known him for maybe six hours and sees right through his self-important crap) knows that he’s putting on a show. Grayson mentions the fact that he can tell that Bats is putting on an Eastwood. Batman is a ridiculous concept when you think too hard about it, but it’s also an awesome one that much of America (even the non-comics reading folks) have loved since childhood, and that’s what I get from this book. “Batman is a crazy idea, pure empowerment fantasy… but doesn’t it rock?”

(“how cool is that?”)

Plus, you know, giant robot dinosaurs, and I am certain that Bruce Wayne also has a giant robot saddle when he has to hop on and ride around Gotham. “C’MON, CRIMINALS! SIC SEMPER TYRANNOSAURUS YOU COWARDS!” (Robin only gets a robot velociraptor on a leash.)

All-Star Supes is just as “stupid.” Superman overdoses on solar radiation, so he’s dying, but he’s also gifted with tremendous strength at the same time. Modern day interpretation? It’s about the fear of death and what makes a man human. However, it’s also every stupid Silver Age story in one. it’s got Superman robots, chess pieces shaped like Superman’s friends, the Fortress of Solitude with the intergalactic zoo, Superman making dresses, future Supermen, keys that probably weigh enough to punch right through the Earth and out the other side, technobabble, journeys to the center of the Earth to visit the Dino-czar, Cat grant eyeing up people’s crotches, Lois Lane with powers… it’s the same thing as All-Star Bats. “Here are all these crazy impossible ideas… robo-dinosaurs, journeys to the center of the Earth… aren’t they wonderful?!”

Then again, this may just be me. I read these books and it’s like I’m reading comics back when I was ten years old and Jim Lee was the biggest guy in comics. The All-Star books are big, stupid, and loud. I’ve enjoyed every issue of both All-Star books greatly, not in the least because Miller, Lee, Morrison, and Quitely are four of my most favorite creators. They’re fun titles that I enjoy reading, and would like to see them collected in extremely handsome hardcovers five years from now when they finally put out issue 12 of both series.

I also like Dark Knight Strikes Again. Once I find time (that’s a ha-ha, good buddy) I may do a few entries on some of my favorite Miller work that’s not DKR (DKSA, 300, The Big Fat Kill). It’s all a matter of time.

Here’s another angle by one Geoff Klock, wherein the author uses fancy words like “grotesque.”

Glyphs: The Language of the Black Comics Community

I’ve got this site hooked up on my RSS feed, and it’s a great resource if you’re looking for info on black-related comics.

Sorry I’ve been away so much. Being a “video games journalist” takes a lot of time out of my day. Posts soon, I promise! I’ll have plenty of stuff to talk about, for sure!

I did some behind the scenes work on 4ldotnet. I upgraded to WordPress 2.0.3, brought the site back from catastrophic failure once or twice when I hit a wrong key, and I also switched out the random banner script for a better one.

You probably won’t notice any of these differences, but they count. I also added a few (fifteen?) banners into the mix. Gavok did them up, I made them suitable for posting, and so I posted them. You can tell the new ones because they have an exclamation point on them. I think that this one is my favorite, though.

I also added an exclamation point to the site name. I can’t really tell you why, but it just feels right. Plus, it’s my site, so shut up, that’s why.

We’re still here! We are all just very, very busy. I’m going to give you some love soon.

I’m kind of annoyed by the new Batwoman, and honestly, it isn’t her fault. Having a lesbian superheroine running around the Bat-branded corner of the DCU isn’t a big deal, although I suspect it’s going to lead to some pretty laughable stories unless Greg Rucka writes them.

What gets me about it is, simply, that whole “sneaking minorities in” aspect that’s running around both of the big two comic book companies. The new Atom’s Asian; the new Batwoman’s a lesbian; the new Blue Beetle’s Hispanic; and so on, and so forth. It seems less like expanding the broad tapestry of racial whatevers and more like blatant tokenism, allowing minorities to join the party but only if they emulate white heroes.

I suppose it’s sort of misguidedly good, because at least they’re there, but it’s always seemed condescending to me somehow. Is it just me?

Last night I went to the local supermall, knowing that they were showing X3 every half hour or so. Considering I got there at 8, I was a bit surprised that the next available showing was at 11:40. Goddamn it.

So, fifteen hamburgers later it’s time to see the movie. This is, after the usual barrage of movie previews, like Superman Returns, Nacho Libre, Leonard Part 6, Three Fast Three Furious and that crappy-looking Omen remake that they tossed together so they could release something evil on 6/6/06. Sadly, no trailers for Snakes on a Plane.

The movie was really pasted together and shoved out the door as fast as possible so Fox could push it to be the big Memorial Day weekend movie. It shows, considering the big clusterfuck we get. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a fun clusterfuck, but it’s a clusterfuck nonetheless. I just love using that word… “it’s”. Read the rest of this entry »

Public service announcements are usually pretty boring. That is, unless licensed characters are involved. That’s why when someone mentions, “Now I know,” anyone who grew up in the 80’s will likely exclaim, “And knowing is half the battle!” There were so many great PSAs that came from old childhood icons. Like that crazy mega-crossover where Alf, the Muppet Babies, Michaelangelo and the Looney Tunes told a kid to stop smoking marijuana. Or that episode of C.O.P.S. where Berserko got into drugs, leading to a cops/crooks team-up against a common foe. Best of all, the time the Ninja Turtles inspired a kid to yell, “I’m not a chicken! You’re a turkey!”

Which leads us to this comic. I remember getting this for free in health class back in middle school, but my memories were foggy. Spider-Man I obviously recognized. Storm I knew the best because of the new X-Men cartoon on Fox. At the time I didn’t know who the hell this Power Man guy was, nor did I really care. But that was then and this is now. It’s been about fifteen years since then and I believe it’s time I look back at this little piece of insanity.

“What the…? Did we just wander into a Dokken video?”

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Direct link to the Superman Returns trailer.

Are you excited? I know I am. This looks to be quite excellent. Kevin Spacey and Routh look to be well cast, too.

I don’t even really like Superman usually and I’m excited!

Let’s run some dates down, all right?
Superman: 1938
Batman: 1939
Wonder Woman: 1941
Flash: 1940 (or 1956)
Captain America: 1941
Spider-Man: 1962
Fantastic Four: 1961
Punisher: 1974
Blade: 1973
X-Men: 1963

Notice a pattern, here?

Most of your famous comics are what, at least thirty years old now? Here are some sales figures for March 2006. How many books in the top 100 are not spin-offs, revamps, or the continuing saga of an ancient property? We have The Sentry #7 coming in at #64, Cyberforce #1 at #83, Spawn #154 at #86, and Y the Last Man #43 at #93

Wait. Runaways. Issue #14 charted at #98.

Let me tell you a little bit about Runaways.
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Reader Review by Nez, send in yours to 4thletter@gmail.com!

“A hip, Warhol-ish journey through a cynical man/superman world as told by a jaded mafia princess, caught in the conflict between yuppie gas guzzlers, and hot lead”
That’s probably a fair example of what all the ‘big boy’ reviews are saying about SUPERMARKET (IDW), the latest showing from veteran comic-noir writer Brian Wood, and indie artist Kristian Donaldson. After reading issues #1 and #2, I’d almost be inclined to agree… almost. Don’t get me wrong, I’d recommend it to anyone, as it’s a terrific read. I just have a completely different take on it. Or do I?  
All vague banter aside, I committed to reading issue #1 after it was literally thrown at me. In a nutshell, SUPERMARKET is about one Pella Suzuki, (half Swede, half Japanese, go figure) a well–off (albeit extremely liberal) teenager who moonlights at a 24-7 convenience store as A) “It’s interesting”, and B) “Making her own money gives her a moral high ground over her parents”. Quickie-mart job aside, the hippie-teenage-rebellion crap is put on ice when “IT” happens. “IT” as it turns out is the brutal murder of both her parents. The situation worsens when after being directed to a secret family safehouse, Pella finds it being ransacked by Yakuza goons. To top things off, her credit cards have been shut down, leading her to believe that her parents were somehow involved in bad things. 
So far, SUPERMARKET (also a street term for the sprawl) has entertained me to say the least. Donaldson’s art is tight, yet grimy enough to get the job done. I would almost acquiesce to “hip” or “Warhol-ish”, if they didn’t sound so gosh darn retarded. Wood’s story moves at a pace that keeps you interested, without rushing things, and the unfolding details of this not-so-classic whodunit keep you wanting more. Between Yakuza chases to the revelation that her mother belonged to a Mafioso comprised of Swedish Adult Film Stars, SUPERMARKET delivers. So yeah, hip, mod, Warhol-ish, whatever, I guess I more or less agree with the ‘big boys’… Just don’t ask me to admit it.