Ultimatum Edit Week 5: Day Five
August 6th, 2009 by Gavok | Tags: captain america, colossus, cyclops, hulk, human torch, iceman, iron man, jean grey, jeph loeb, kitty pryde, Marvel comics, ms marvel, nick fury, rogue, ultimate edit, ultimates, ultimatum, wolverine, x-menYesterday, Jean Grey forced Magneto to see Nick Fury’s memories, which caused Magneto to repent all of his wrongdoing. Then Cyclops acted like a total hero by exploding the head of an old man who was no longer a threat. Good going, guy.
In the actual comic, Fury really showed Magneto how mutants were man-made in a laboratory, as part of Ultimate Origins. I’m still not totally sure why this caused Magneto to change his ways completely. Magneto’s war stopped being humans vs. mutants a while ago, what with him not only killing mutants by the score, but the fact that he was killing his own underlings for the hell of it. And yet this little snippet of information puts him into, “What have I done?!” mode.
Let us move forward.
I blame ManiacClown for that Burma Shave gag and the Wonder Pets thing. Give the guy a break on the latter one. He’s a father. It’s his business to watch that show.
We’ll continue with the X-Men insanity tomorrow, plus a little trip to Latveria.
Hey now, the first year or two of Mutant X was actually pretty fun!
by Endless Mike August 6th, 2009 at 05:36 --replyI wish some writer with at least a little experience in Biology would break it to the X-Universe that Mutants can’t technically be defined as a Species. They differ genetically from humans, but in wildly different ways; they differ morphologically and physiologically, again in wildly different ways; they can interbreed with each other, but also with humans.
At best, they are a genetically distinct race or sub-culture of humanity.
by Stig August 6th, 2009 at 05:57 --reply@Stig
They’ve been written as a subspecies for a long time. It was always the “better than humans” crew that insisted that they were a unique species. It’s also canon that the X-gene is a specific gene that somehow manages to manifest in wildly different ways. It’s best not to apply real science to mutants, anyway, and even worse to apply it to Loeb’s works.
by Endless Mike August 6th, 2009 at 07:18 --replyStig,
these creators think that “sapiens” is a plural. Don’t go breakin’ your heart.
(Cyclops’ brains are cracking me up. Secret Power: DONUTHEAD)
//Oo/\
by Matthew Craig August 6th, 2009 at 09:10 --replySo there’s no reset button at all? Damn, Marvel sucks.
by Jason August 6th, 2009 at 09:27 --replyIt’s sobering to realize you’ve read/owned a solid half of the “bad comics worse than Ultimatum”. Then I realize that I did that without ever paying for Ult3/Ultimatum itself and I feel all fuzzy inside.
(ps: yeah terror titans is still better than this shit)
by Syrg August 6th, 2009 at 11:22 --replyHey, “Superman: At World’s End” is an incredible wonderful piece of shit. It goes so far past bad that it comes back as friggin’ incredible. It has Hitler, a gun that puts *any* of Cable’s to shame, and Superman has the most awesome Old-Testament beard ever. Best. Schlock. Ever.
Oh, and although I don’t think it was great, I wouldn’t have said that Mutant X was all that bad either. It was a entertaining but middling concept that laid the groundwork for Exiles, which started off great but eventually became much much much much much worse.
by Liquidben August 6th, 2009 at 11:38 --replyI AM A MAN
by Nathan August 6th, 2009 at 12:08 --replySomebody please tell me I’m not the only one who actually gets the Burma-Shave gag. Fun fact: We were going to put Twinkie the Kid on one of the crowd’s signs, but two things happened. First, I think the Burma-Shave signs crowded that joke out. Second, we both just plum forgot, apparently.
by ManiacClown August 6th, 2009 at 13:02 --reply@ManiacClown: They released the MAD hardback collections some time ago. I read ‘Starchie!’ just yesterday, by sheer coincidence.
by Stig August 6th, 2009 at 13:27 --replyHAHAHA oh my god, the Burma Shave ad. Delightful.
by Dane August 6th, 2009 at 13:40 --replyNot just Hitler, liquidben.
HitlerS, plural! 2 of them.
That’s 100% more Hitlers than most works featuring Hitlers, but less than the main Marvel U or the Boys from Brazil.
by Bret August 6th, 2009 at 13:57 --reply…A Billy Ray Cyrus comic? By MARVEL?! Do I want an explanation?
by Dan Brown August 6th, 2009 at 14:41 --reply@Dan Brown: Yes you do. Go read about it.
by Gavok August 6th, 2009 at 16:19 --replyCarnage unleashed worse then Ultimatum? That was so bad it was funny whereas Loeb Stuff has to be edited to stop the reader wanting to kill themselves, Ultimatum was just so bad it was bad, and at least most of that list was self contained shite whereas the ultimate U is now ruined.
Excellent edits thanks for a good laugh.
by Toby Stokes August 7th, 2009 at 03:26 --reply@Toby Stokes: You need better reading comprehension. Reread that page and try again.
by Gavok August 7th, 2009 at 03:36 --replyWait, there was an elseworlds where Batman was Lobo? That sounds awesome.
by NJJ May 25th, 2010 at 18:30 --reply@NJJ: No, it was an Elseworlds where Joker hired Lobo to dress up as Batman. It wasn’t very good.
by Gavok May 25th, 2010 at 20:37 --reply