Ultimate Edit Week 5: Day Three
September 29th, 2008 by Gavok | Tags: captain america, giant man, iron man, jeph loeb, juggernaut, Marvel comics, mastermind, pyro, ruin the moment, ultimate avengers, ultimates, valkyrie, war machine, wasp, wolverineYesterday saw more scheming from Ultron/Yellowjacket, who has more holes in his plan than Bonnie and Clyde. Then Magneto went on a magnetic rampage until a bunch of robots fell out of the sky.
Now it’s time to discover the secret of WHO IS BLACK PANTHER?!
If you’re wondering, the real answer for why he’s dressed as Black Panther is “We’ll discuss it later, Jan. Magneto is the real priority.” I hate you, Ultimates 3.
Join us again tomorrow as we’ll get more hot Valkyrie action.
Day Four!
Day Five!
Day Six!
Day Seven!
*sigh*
The most annoying part of Loeb’s story (aside from the fact that he’s already on tap along with Frank Cho of all people to do vol. 4) is that it actually makes me miss Millar’s Michael Bay Avengers…
by LurkerWithout September 29th, 2008 at 03:09 --replyThere’s a pretty decent chance that’s Odin. Ultimate Odin.
Also, Wolverine stopped the Juggernaut.
by Mack September 29th, 2008 at 05:39 --replyFrank Cho, eh? Someone really wants the Ultimates to be a) sexy and b) late.
by HitTheTargets September 29th, 2008 at 07:46 --replyTo Mack: Seriously, I think it’s Loki. First, he doesn’t look like Odin physically would— an old, broadly-built Nordic man. Second, and this kind of ties in to the first part— notice he’s got two good eyes. Were it Odin, one of those eyes wouldn’t have been glowing. Consider that Loki as her benefactor sets up a traitor situation, which has already been done in Ultimates— hence, Loeb will rehash it in a much less talented fashion. To call it ham-handed would be an insult to that most glorious (and funny) of meats.
As for Juggernaut, note that he was already at rest when Wolvie came in Dino-Riders-style. Hence, Wolvie didn’t stop him— he just redirected whatever energy Juggernaut had going already in his fist. Does that even count? Are Juggy’s punches unstoppable as well as his charges? Why am I even considering this?
by ManiacClown September 29th, 2008 at 09:18 --replySo then who’s cap?
by John September 29th, 2008 at 11:25 --replyCap was Cap, except for the last issue, where he was a robot with a heart of gold.
by Gavok September 29th, 2008 at 11:37 --replyCap will turn out to have been a plucky girl actress who’s pretending to be a man so she can… I don’t know, what the Hell do the women in those movies do? Try to get the captain of the football team to like them? Yes. Cap is a woman who wants the captain of the football team to like him. At some point there will be an awkward shower scene where he desperately tries to cover up his non-dong so as not to reveal his secret. I daresay this is where Loeb’s headed. It’s not much dumber than anything else he’s done.
by ManiacClown September 29th, 2008 at 15:33 --replyFrank Cho, eh? Someone really wants the Ultimates to be a) sexy and b) late.
Sooo… same ol’, same ol’.
re: ManiacClown’s Plot Prediction
…In his defence, “She’s the Man” wasn’t completely horrible.
Oh, and ‘Vokkers: I gotta say: The character selection recap page has to be my single favourite page in all the Ultimate Edits, ever.
by Owesome September 29th, 2008 at 20:27 --replyNobody does tasteful rape like Jeph Loeb!
by Jring September 30th, 2008 at 00:36 --reply