Quick post while I wrap up some other things–

Ultimates 2 #13 was a letdown. I mean, come on, how many of those pages had like one word balloon on them? And the wrap-up? It was blah. I don’t really want to spoil it if you haven’t read it, but you aren’t really missing anything, just another Millar anticlimax.

You want to see an ending? Read Wisdom #6. Paul Cornell and Manuel Garcia knock it so far out of the park it isn’t even funny, and manage to work in an origin story for a new Killraven all at the same time.

Killraven!

Anyway, the ending is pretty good. It wraps up the loose ends and ends on a kind of really low-key scene that’s a great payoff if you know the character. Very recommended! It is the anti-Ultimates 2 #13.

Later tonight, I hopes, look for some more reviews.

As inspired by a post on Higher Voltage, I present to you: World War Hulk, the Vastly Abridged Version Where Things Actually Do Change Somehow.

(Honestly, at this point, the best thing for the Marvel Universe would probably be the Hulk killing off half of their established cast to thin the herd, but there’s a goddamn Iron Man movie coming out, so that can’t happen…)

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No disrespect, but you a psycho, honey
Got that S.S.I. money and you start actin’ funny
Shrimps every night, ordering steaks
Them jumbo joints, them shits cost a buck fifty for eight
And when you told me your Merlot, need more grapes
I said “Honey, you never had wine before!”
And if you did, that’s not how you act at all
And no… that’s not how we rock in Theodore

–Ghostface Killah, “Tooken Back”

Sana Takeda (1, 2)’s cover to Heroes for Hire 13:

Jock (1, 2)’s cover to Green Arrow Year One:

Khari Evans (1, 2)’s cover to Shanna #1:

Last time it was Alex Ross’s boring Steel-on-a-black-background cover. This time it’s Sana Takeda’s ugly and creepy Heroes for Hire cover.

In exchange, I give you Jock and Khari Evans.

How do you go from a Michael Golden cover to something ugly and tentacle-rapey (also Misty is apparently not black) in a matter of months? Look at this:

I like cheescake comics. Bomb Queen, Cavewoman, those are funny books. But, Marvel, seriously– cheesecake is supposed to be attractive. Mewling little animu girls chained up around some slimy tentacles isn’t it. You’ve got the best artists in the biz and this is the best you come with?

Put Khari Evans on Heroes for Hire so that it will have good art again, please. I am for real here, I kind of like Shanna the She-Devil or whoever, but Khari is made for an ongoing book. He’s got a great style. Make him a Young Gun or whatever, push him hard.

About that Takeda cover… Marvel, that’s not how we rock in Theodore.

Get it together.

And you see, I don’t want to make the fucking comics. Making the fucking comics is hard fucking work. [snip]

But the fucking comics need to be made.

—Cheryl Lynn, Digital Femme, 1998

I said “Yeah, Flipmode, Flipmode is the greatest”
Knowing as a shorty, I was always told
That if I ain’t gon’ be part of the greatest
I gotta be the greatest myself

–Busta Rhymes, Extinction Level Event, 1998

Bear with me, as I have things what need saying. This will relate directly to comics and the blogosphere a little further down.

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This is probably #348 on the “They made a comic based on this?” list. Somewhere between Pirates of Dark Water and Married with Children. Not saying it’s an undeserved concept. A Vigilante 8 comic sounds pretty good on paper. The reality of Chaos Comics’ output, unfortunately, leaves a lot to be desired.

For those of you who have no idea what Vigilante 8 is, it’s a two-game series from the late-90’s, as part of the all-too-skinny car combat videogame subgenre. You choose one of several cars and drive around different locales, with the mission of not finishing a race, but instead, blowing up every opposing car with rockets, mines and the like. While it never quite received the popularity of Twisted Metal, I personally have always enjoyed the Vigilante 8 series.

The story takes place in the 70’s, during a major oil crisis. The multi-national corporation OMAR (Oil Monopoly Alliance Regime) is out to take out an oil monopoly on the entire world, but the US government won’t back down. As a way to take it to the stubborn Americans, OMAR hires terrorist and explosives expert Sid Burn to blow up several US oil refineries. With his gang, the Coyotes, Burn has an easy enough time beating the law. That’s when the trucker Convoy – who is basically Sam Elliot – starts a group of citizens bent on striking back, calling themselves the Vigilantes. Also, thanks to the discovery of a crashed alien spacecraft, the government has been able to construct some rather advanced weaponry. During a raid by the Coyotes, said weaponry landed in the hands of both the Vigilantes and the Coyotes, increasing the explosive level of their battles.

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Before I do anything else–

Have you guys heard the new DJ Jazzy Jeff record? It is sick. Every single track is dope.

Anyway, I am in SF right now. Got a place, did some time at my job, and did a bunch of things San Franciscans do. I drank Chai Tea Latte at a Starbucks (it is good), rode the bus, and played phone tag with Comcast for two hours plus. On Friday, I get the honor of doing it again, this time in person with a four hour window for installation. Hurray.

Anyway, I live roughly a mile from Isotope Comics, so guess what my new comics shop is! Sending in the pull list later tonight, most likely.

Ed Brubaker signing there this Saturday at 8 til midnight. I’ll be there with the copy of Coward I bought last week!

Speaking of buying comics, and because I am a little short on content right now, here’s what I picked up at the Isotope. Haven’t read any of it yet, though.

All-Star Batman & Robin the Boy Wonder 5
The Plain Janes by Cecil Castellucci and Jim Rugg
Shot Callerz by Gary Phillips and Brett Weldele
Static Shock Trial By Fire by like six dudes with long names
The Annotated Mantooth by Fraction, Kuhn, and Fisher
Kyle Baker: Cartoonist
Nat Turner v2

Reviews coming soon as I work through my 4l backlog.

edit: I am maybe six pages into All-Star Bats and this is easily the best issue yet. I don’t see how people don’t like this comic!

I’m sitting in an airport in Phoenix, AZ right now, waiting on a plane that hits in an hour. After that, I’m off to San Francisco to get the keys to my new apartment, see about buying a bed, maybe a TV, and all those other things. I also need to see about getting the internet turned on, which means I need to either choose Verizon or Comcast.

So, yeah, a Brothers might be a little silent for the next few days.

Via Ragnell–

I’m not 100% clear on the difference between a blog carnival and a linkblog (a carnival is more discerning, I guess?), but here’s one that sounds interesting.

Why A Carnival?
Because Lt. Uhura should have had more lines. (ST: TOS)
Because Kevin Sorbo was jealous of Keith Hamilton Cobb and wrote him out. (Andromeda)
Because among other butchery, the SciFi Channel made Ged white. (EarthSea)
Because Forrest was a plot point and Graham was an extra. (Btvs)
Because Ronon Dex is not a savagely sexual wild man. (SGA)
Because Aiden Ford deserved better. (SGA)
Because Goliath showed up only to get killed. (Marvel: CW)
Because Vixen should have been more than the other woman. (JLU)
Because Carl Lumbly should be remembered for MANTIS.
Because Milestone Media deserved more love.
Because there should be more shows like Afro Saumrai
Because there should be more heroines like Jade and Juniper Lee.
Because Bianca Lawson tried out for the role of Cordelia Chase instead of Kendra. (BtVS)
Because Pete Ross drowned in a sea of nothingness (Smallville)
Because it can feel isolating among other journalers and bloggers.
Because it could encourage other People of Color to speak up more.
Because there are illustrators of color who don’t get to put faces like theirs on the front of a SF book.

Can you think of more reasons? I’m sure you can.

PoC SF Carnival: We Exist. And We Are Not Invisible

People of Colour SciFi Carnival. Go take a look and submit something if you so choose. It launches mid-June.

(can anyone tell me what a fen is? i’m thinking swamps and marshes and that can’t be right.)

Time for something a little different. A few weeks ago, I talked about the World Championship Wrestling comic, discussing a horrifying clash between comics and wrestling. Of course, I’m not done. I have to cover WWF Battlemania, after all. Plus I have a guest article on the way covering a comic that’s very concept causes my brain to explode.

Mixing comics and wrestling isn’t always a bad thing, though. I’d like to talk to you about CHIKARA, an independent wrestling federation that lives out of Pennsylvania. I had heard of it a while ago, but only recently have I given it a look. A couple weeks ago, I was invited to tag along to their show Rey De Voladores and I was basically blown away. It’s got everything I want in wrestling. The wrestling talent is there, giving us innovative and exciting match-ups. It’s got enough story to get by without making it more important than the actual matches. Even when the match is lopsided and the winner is blatant, they don’t make it a one-sided match that lasts two minutes. The match-ups aren’t entirely stuck on good vs. evil. Two heels can fight without having to worry about the crowd not knowing who to cheer for. Two tag partners can compete against each other without some forced storyline about them breaking up.

Most importantly is the fun factor. A lot of these guys are just weird. There’s a guy named the Hydra, who wears a monster mask, but is so skinny that he has to draw a six-pack onto himself with a sharpie in a desperate attempt to make himself seem menacing. There’s Chuck Taylor, once a smiling good guy, now driven mad by success and ego as he physically threatens children and the elderly on a regular basis. He also has a random love for dolphins and has the theme from Pete and Pete as his entrance music. There’s Player Uno, the 8-Bit Luchador, who usually wears tights that resemble overalls, as well as a lucha mask and a cap. During some matches, he’ll even kick a turtle shell into his opponents.

Others I’ll get to later.

The point of this article is the DVDs. Since CHIKARA doesn’t have a TV deal, they mostly get by with their DVD sales. This is actually what got my initial attention, as many of the DVD covers are based on classic comic book covers. The homage covers are done by Marco de Alfonso (possibly spelled wrong) and he does an amazing job.

Let’s have a look.

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