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The Top 70 Deadpool Moments Day 6: You May Be Right, I May Be Crazy

May 1st, 2009 by | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

You ever heard of that Mugen thing? It’s a program to make your own fighting game characters. While some people will just use it to make the usual Street Fighter vs. Mortal Kombat type of stuff using graphics and sprites that already exist, there are some people out there who go the extra mile and make an entire character from scratch. One such character is Deadpool, made to fit into the Marvel vs. Capcom style. Check out this video of him in use. Also, he has plenty of special intro animations.

The Bob/ninjas special move is inspired.

20) Telling off T-Ray
Deadpool #33 (1999)
Writer: Joe Kelly

With Joe Kelly’s run reaching the end, we’re given the big showdown between Deadpool and T-Ray. Using some magic mumbo jumbo, T-Ray is able to show his true past to Deadpool and Mercedes Wilson. T-Ray is the real Wade Wilson and made the mistake of saving the life of a no-good mercenary named Jack. Jack killed Wade in an attempt to take his identity and accidentally got Mercedes killed in the process. He went crazy and believed himself to be Wade Wilson.

T-Ray uses this revelation to show Deadpool how evil he truly is. He resurrected his wife as part of his plan to tear at Deadpool’s soul and make him suffer with guilt. Then he shows Deadpool all the people he’s ever killed. In one nice spread, we see a crowd of thousands, with many easy to recognize if you’ve been paying attention to his comic appearances. The absolute scale of what he’s done cripples Deadpool and causes him to question his own actions. T-Ray taunts Deadpool, asking him how it feels to see his whole attempt to redeem himself shattered by the knowledge that he never had any redeeming qualities in his past to begin with.

Deadpool then… starts laughing. He laughs hard. T-Ray is beside himself. How could he possibly react to his masterstroke with laughter? Wiping the tears from his eyes, Deadpool explains himself. Sure, T-Ray came close to breaking him, but then he had a moment of clarity about squirrels and coconuts.

He tells Mercedes that he is really, really sorry about what happened to her and that he’ll never forgive himself for it. But for all the other countless corpses? Fuck ‘em. He’s glad they’re all dead. He had a blast killing every one of them.

T-Ray is even angrier. Deadpool can’t just get a slap on the wrist and try and move on. He needs to be punished for corrupting him and making him a monster.

“You pathetic mouthbreather… You think I was born this way? Violence is a cycle… I was made… just like you were. But you improved on the original, big boy… I may have been a piece of garbage… but I didn’t bring my wife back from the dead and set her up to fall in love with her murderer, just to torture some down on his luck slob… now did I?” He surprises T-Ray with a kiss on the nose. “Ask the lady which was worse… death, or this. Checkmate, jerk.”

He sucker-punches T-Ray and is able to hurt him, thanks to Mercedes stealing away some of T-Ray’s energies. Mercedes breaks up the fight, but wants nothing to do with this. She lets Deadpool live and leaves with T-Ray, furious at both of them. Before vanishing away, T-Ray tells Deadpool that he can keep the name “Wade Wilson”. Deadpool dusts himself off and runs into a fight with all his undead victims.

Let’s look at what the peanut gallery has to say on this one.

First, on lead vocals, Jayce Russell!

The big one’s issue #33, from the moment Deadpool starts cracking up about halfway through the book, through the massive breakdown and ‘Pool’s reaction, right past the nutshot from Mercedes, and straight into his free month with Death. I’ll admit, a lot of this is just a gut reaction so it’s not exactly the most valid thing ever, and it’s a section in the book I always wish McG had stuck around for, but it’s the ultimate summation of everything about Deadpool. The two pages that start with the cartoon squirrel metaphor are probably the best choice for a legitimate moment, from the metaphor itself to the incredibly heartfelt request that Mercedes not follow the same path he and T-Ray had lead themselves down. It’s the pay-off for 32 issues of dancing around the question of if Deadpool could really become a good person, answering it with a simple “no,” and the more complex, “but he doesn’t have to enjoy it.” Catharsis and tragedy wrapped up in one suckerpunch, followed by the payoff of a fight scene against all the corpses he’d piled through the series, and with the room left to give ol’ “Wade” some time to make sweet with the skeleton lady. That’s how you end a storyline.

And on lead guitar, Lee Francis!

Basically this page and the page following it are what made Deadpool my favorite character. Yeah, pop culture references are great, and absurdist humor is awesome, and red and black are my favorite colors, and he fights using swords AND guns – but the true core of it, or at least the way i prefer it, is Deadpool is basically someone who has had a horrible life, and has done horrible things, and is now trying to do the right thing – even if he is still pretty fucked in the head.

There’s been a lot of Deadpool books made since Kelly’s run and they mostly tend to be “HURR HUR JOKES CHIMICHANGA INSANE IN THE MEMBRAAAAANE” and while that can be amusing, the best stories – THE BEST ONE – show an intensely damaged individual, fumbling around and trying to do the right thing. None of those stories are by Frank Tieri though. Fuck that guy.

And playing goalie, Michelle P.!

The one that comes immediately to mind is from the original Kelly run, issue #33. I don’t know the pages exactly, but it’s basically when T-Ray takes Deadpool to pieces, bringing him to hell and showing him everyone he’s ever killed and Deadpool replies by… laughing.

What makes this scene for me is the whole lead up; the attempts Deadpool has made to turn his life around, to be good for something other than killing, only to have the point hammered home again and again that he’s a killer, not a hero. Wade tries to cling to the hope that he was once a good man, and could become good again, but T-Ray strips even that from him.

So Wade delivers what is probably my favorite speech in the whole run; what I think of as the “Cartoon Hell Speech”. It perfectly sums up the entire run until that point: Deadpool is cartoon hell. It’s as unpleasant and ridiculous as the name implies.

19) Saving Copycat
Deadpool: The Circle Chase #4 (1993)
Writer: Fabian Nicieza

Circle Chase wasn’t all that fun. It’s really just Deadpool racing and fighting against a bunch of iffy 90’s designs and Juggernaut. The final moments do have a bit of meaning to the character. Like I’ve mentioned in the first article, a lot of Deadpool’s appearances in the early days were about him abusing Copycat. Super-powered mutant or not, that’s a dick thing. He went a long while without being even slightly redeeming other than having a sense of humor.

Deadpool is on the way towards finding this big, expensive prize that plenty of mercs and criminals are on the hunt for. When he reaches the end of his journey, he gets in a fight with a killer named Slayback. When Slayback goes to impale Deadpool, Copycat jumps in and receives the stabbing instead because a long time ago, she loved Wade. Slayback feels no remorse and goes back after Deadpool.

That’s when the prize shows itself. It’s Adam Unit-Zero, an android out to nullify all weapons of war. He sees Slayback, recognizes him as nothing more than a weapon and vaporizes him. He looks and Weasel and decides that he is of little threat. He looks at Garrison Kane and considers him conflicting, but more good than bad, so he lets him live. Then he looks down at Wade.

“Analyzed biological and technological weapon of war: Proceed with nullification///”

He gets Copycat to steal his power and the hole in her midsection closes itself. Adam Unit-Zero considers Deadpool a conundrum and decides that further study will eventually be needed. He leaves the scene. Soon after, Copycat leaves with Kane, saying that despite what just happened, she doesn’t love Deadpool anymore.

Deadpool seems pretty down until Weasel points out that for the first time maybe ever, Deadpool showed he can do more than kill. For a second, that boosts Wade’s spirit.

18) The First Hallucinations
Wolverine: Origins #21 (2008)
Writer: Daniel Way

The first few issues of the Deadpool arc in Wolverine: Origins is a definite fun read. Granted, that is if Steve Dillon’s facial art doesn’t chafe you too much. It’s just one big action sequence, including such moments as Deadpool paying a guy a ton of money just to drop a piano on Wolverine.

This brings us to the first instance of Daniel Way’s new status quo for the character: the Deadpool delusions. Not only is the guy so insane that he has conversations with two separate voices in his head, but he sometimes sees things in a more cartoony vision, like something out of a Tex Avery cartoon. The jury’s still out on whether this is a good idea and has staying power, but the first time it pops up definitely made me smile.

Deadpool challenges Wolverine and sees him as a pipsqueak coward, shaking in his boots. Wolverine reacts the correct way.

He then slashes Deadpool in the face, snapping him out of his funk.

17) Sandi’s Boyfriend
Deadpool #69 (2002)
Writer: Gail Simone

Deadpool has noticed before going out on a job that his secretary Sandi has been trying to hide a black eye. At the end of the penultimate issue, he finds that Sandi has been hospitalized. It isn’t the work of the Black Swan and Nijo, but of Sandi’s douche of a boyfriend.

At the beginning of his final issue, we see Deadpool at Sandi’s hospital bed along with Ratbag and Taskmaster. Deadpool doesn’t know how to deal with comforting a hospitalized friend who for once didn’t have it coming. He surprises himself by being a natural at making Sandi feel better through comedy. Unfortunately, she makes him promise not to kill her boyfriend, which frustrates the hell out of him. She does give him full permission to teach him a less-than-lethal message, though.

Deadpool tracks the guy down and gives him the beating he deserves. You know, beating up a dude who just hospitalized a helpless woman is like the ultimate in justice. It always rocks. It’s like that episode of Roseanne when Dan found out that Jackie’s boyfriend… sorry, tangent.

Before the dude can do anything, Sandi’s admirer Taskmaster appears with a gun. “You know, it’s a funny thing – but I didn’t promise her squat.”

Hey, you! Over there! Mr. BodyMassageMachine! Say some stuff about this scene!

While it ultimately comes off as more of a badass Taskmaster moment, this is a great DP scene because it proves just how non-nutty he can be. Everyone thinks of DP as this goofy/insane/childish character, when he’s really just this messed up guy who uses humor to subside his own pain. In the face of armageddon, he’ll be cracking jokes and referencing pop stars, but hurt someone that actually matters to him, and suddenly that goofball in the imitation Spider-Man outfit is a serious threat that you do not want to mess around with.

16) Chain of Fools
Deadpool #66-67 (2002)
Writer: Gail Simone

Deadpool needs a piece of Rhino’s horn as part of his job. Apparently it has some kind of super Viagra ingredient in it or something. Deadpool’s the underdog as is, but considering his aim is on the fritz, his chances of coming out alive are even worse. He ends up winning by aiming a spray of Pym Particles at his own face, thereby hitting Rhino instead and shrinking him.

Deadpool keeps the little guy as a reluctant pet, promising him that he’ll use the growth serum on him eventually. Then in the next issue, he turns Rhino into his own personal keychain, pissing the little Spidey villain off even more.

Mini-Rhino aids Deadpool in preventing an assassination attempt on Dazzler. Then Deadpool realizes that this buddy movie isn’t working out, so he sprays Rhino… with aerosol cheese. Rhino loses it and starts running head-first into Deadpool’s ankles. Deadpool hits the little guy with a bullet and stuns him enough to throw him in the toilet and flush him out of his hair.

I notice that Rhino is in love with Dazzler and her music. Him and Juggernaut. That love triangle is a Valentines Day comic in the making.

15) Meet the Black Talon
Deadpool #29 (1999)
Writer: Joe Kelly

Deadpool just got Mercedes back into his life and has her sleeping comfortably in his home, wearing a Tenacious D t-shirt (which means that Kelly has great taste). Wouldn’t you know it, a hooded figure busts in with a bunch of zombies to kidnap her. Deadpool fights them off best he can, but they’re too much for him. Man, what is it with Deadpool and the undead?

The leader reveals himself to be none other than the Black Talon!

You know, Dan Slott totally ripped off this bit in Spider-Man & Human Torch.

Deadpool is to be sacrificed with a knife to his heart. Then he sees Mercedes being dragged over, which gets him furious at Monty for failing to keep her safe… until seeing Monty’s plan. Monty is crawling over to free Deadpool, but doing it while pretending to be a zombie. The entire thing is a riot, with him saying such zombie-like things as, “Send more cops…” and “Brains is good food.”

That last one catches Black Talon off guard after a delay and allows Deadpool to get back up and get a little revenge on the chicken man.

I hope and pray that no matter how long I live, I never stop finding, “THE CHICKEN SAID PEEP!” side-splitting.

14) BUUUULLLEEETTTSSS!!
X-Force v.2 #14 (2009)
Writers: Craig Kyle and Christopher Yost

Here it is, the most recent act to make the list.

We’ve already discussed why Deadpool is alive in the future world of Messiah War. We just haven’t discussed how crazed he is, compared to the abnorm.

Cable, X-Force and Deadpool are being attacked by one of Stryfe’s armies. As Cable’s narration goes over everyone, we see one panel perfectly depicting a far-gone Deadpool. His game face has him letting out a huge war scream while awkwardly aiming his guns upwards in ways that can’t work well into any strategy.

Yes, his mind is extensively damaged, but does that make him dead weight?

Once he finishes, all his enemies fall and X-Force is completely untouched. Rather than bask in his badassness, Deadpool grabs the corpse he had been working on and continues to shoot it in the head repeatedly.

13) All of the Revenge?
Wolverine: Origins #24 (2008)
Writer: Daniel Way

We go back to the Wolverine vs. Deadpool arc in Wolverine: Origins and hit the point after Deadpool has successfully defeated and captured Wolverine. To follow through on all the action-packed mayhem, we get an issue that is all about Wolverine and Deadpool talking.

It’s crazy now that I think about it. Deadpool is based out of Wolverine’s DNA. He’s a spinoff of Logan’s existence. We’ve had all these meetings between the two via guest appearances and the like, and they’ve made each other bleed time and time again, but at no point did they ever go in-depth about how they relate to each other.

Wolverine awakens to find himself in a hidden lair, tied up and about to be dropped into water, which is sure to drown him. Deadpool admits that the cost of this entire mission is more than the price he’s been hired for, but it’s totally worth it. When Deadpool questions Wolverine’s behavior across this comic’s run and all the people’s he’s gone after lately, Wolverine begrudgingly admits it’s out of revenge. He’s trying to get revenge on the people who messed him up over the years.

Deadpool absolutely roars with laughter over this so much that he has to remove his mask to wipe a tear. “You think that you deserve to get some revenge. How much revenge, Logan? All of the revenge? You are such a $%@&ing baby.”

Certain lines in the conversation lead to flashbacks of Wade’s relationship with his abusive father, which when you look at it, gives you a fucked up idea of how Deadpool sees Wolverine in the scheme of things.

Deadpool looks at his maskless reflection in the water and tugs down his hood. Under his breath, he growls, “I’m the one who should be out for revenge…”

When you compare the two, it’s easy to see why he would have this reaction. Wolverine has friends and family. He has the ability to move forward with his life and forget the past. Sure, he may be a mutant, but most of the time he passes as pretty normal. He’s a man who looks like Hugh Jackman, gets his share of tail, lives in a fancy mansion and is admired and respected by many. And he wants to leave that behind for revenge!

Deadpool has never gone out of his way for revenge and in his shoes, he deserves it more than Logan. He’s absolutely hideous and has only a handful of people he can consider friends. Barely anyone worth anything respects him. When you’re Deadpool, looking out the window of your dank apartment, and you look at the grass on Wolverine’s lawn, you bet your ass it’s going to look greener. The audacity to think about the past when you have so much going on in the present must be giving Deadpool an aneurism.

He even mentions his bitterness at never being asked to join the X-Men, which even surprises Wolverine, since Deadpool isn’t a mutant. For a long while, Deadpool had been joking about being a member of the team, but we get to see that deep inside, he really, really wants to be one of them. He may not have a special gene inside his body that nobody would be able to see anyway, but he’s a living freakshow – and as far as he’s concerned – is no different from Wolverine. But Wolverine’s urine test shows he’s X-gene positive, so he gets to be in their little club.

When you’re so messed up that even the gang of freaks that nobody likes shun you and say you don’t belong, you better believe you’re going to have issues.

Sadly, this awesome conversation is interrupted by Daken and his ugly hair. Ah, well.

I have to say, when I started reading this arc, I could tell that Way was going to be writing the next Deadpool solo series and that this was his tryout session. This issue especially earned my support, but I have to tell you, I was worried for a while. See, the last time Daniel Way was put in charge of a series starring one of my favorite characters, we got a scene where Venom French-kisses the Thing.

And if that last sentence isn’t enough to get you to keep up on my series We Care a Lot, then I really don’t know what you’re doing on my site in the first place.

12) Clone Brigade
Deadpool #0 (1998)
Writer: Joe Kelly

This is part of a comic Kelly did in conjunction with Wizard Magazine. In it, Deadpool runs afoul of the TV-faced Arnim Zola. Deadpool shoots and kills Vampanimus, which gets him befuddled because didn’t he already kill that guy/girl? Zola shows that he’s been on a cloning spree and sends an army of dead Marvel characters his way.

And other than Bucky, these aren’t the good dead characters. These are guys like Whizzer, Thunderbolt and Kangaroo. Even if Deadpool’s reluctant to kill during the time of this comic, he figures that they don’t count as real people, so he’s totally cool with killing them. And kill them he totally does! Pages and pages of death and mayhem!

That’s not the best part. The best part is when he finds a couple other clones covered in a sheet. He pulls it back to find…!

What were those wise words given to me by Prodigal? Oh yeah!

The all-time greatest Deadpool moment for me was when he wound up seeing Clone Uncle Ben having sex with Clone Aunt May in the story where somebody had cloned every dead Marvel character ever.

I miss that comic.

I don’t think Deadpool misses that comic, chief.

Once finished with his unholy killing spree, Deadpool confronts Zola. Zola begs his way out of his own slaying by bringing up some DNA samples he has lying around. He whispers into Deadpool’s ear, who is completely on board with this concept.

Later on, Deadpool and Blind Al lounge around the old home with a foursome of bikini-clad Gwen Stacy maids fulfilling their every whim. And that, my friends, is the happiest ending of all.

11) Goofus with Yellow Word Bubbles
Baby’s First Deadpool Book (1998)
Writer: Joe Kelly

I don’t know what kind of madness led to Marvel releasing Baby’s First Deadpool Book, but God bless them. It has little touches you’d see in a kid’s book or magazine, such as a paperdoll “dress Deadpool” page, a paint-by-numbers page of Deadpool playing poker with Lockjaw and Wolfsbane, or a cartoony poem about Deadpool and his adventure with a Barney knockoff. There’s a great poem in there about the alphabet and how it relates to Deadpool, including such lines as, “K is for Killbrew, killed by the Cleaner, L is for Liquor, which makes Deadpool meaner!”

But the true selling point that everyone remembers this one-shot for? None other than Deadpool and Captain America in their own Marvelized version of Goofus and Gallant.

Classic.

Tomorrow is the finale of our countdown, but before we get to that top ten, let’s check out another kind. Since five is too small for this, here’s the TOP TEN BEST DEADPOOL COVERS!

10) Deadpool #51

9) Deadpool #4

8) Cable/Deadpool #7

7) Deadpool #66

6) Deadpool #55

5) Deadpool v.2 #2

4) Deadpool #68

3) Deadpool #5

2) Wolverine #88

1) Cable/Deadpool #9

And with that done, check in tomorrow so we can finish this list and I can get some actual sleep.

Hm, I wonder if anyone’s going to be so dumb that he’ll skim this page and think that the ten best Deadpool moments are all cover images.

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    9 comments to “The Top 70 Deadpool Moments Day 6: You May Be Right, I May Be Crazy”

    1. No love for the Amazing Fantasy cover homage? And I’m surprised Kelly’s finale didn’t crack the top ten, especially with Wade getting into a battle with all the people he’s killed, mangling the theme to The Love Boat in the process. Then he gets to spend quality time with Death, who clearly prefers him to Thanos.


    2. Deadpool #68’s cover is a layout and idea I’ve seen before, like here. I wonder if it’s an homage to something?


    3. Agreeing with Jason. How is the Amazing Fantasy cover not on that Top Five? That a being said, I’ve always loved the sweet Batman homage in #51. Kid Deadpool made me a happy camper.

      I mean, I can only presume that since it hasn’t shown up yet, that whole issue is gonna be in the finale tomorrow. That’s kind of a given.


    4. The Amazing Fantasy cover homage is a good one, but I guess I’ve seen it done so many times that it doesn’t do it for me as much.

      As for the Kelly finale not getting in the top ten, I think a lot of it has to do with how ultimately it’s a big denouement. The run really pushes towards the Mithras storyline more than anything and I figure most people remember it more for that than the Deadpool/T-Ray talk-fest. It’s a great issue, yes, but it doesn’t feel like so much of a grand finale after following up on all the crazy crap going on in #25.

      The Mithras stuff is Xorn/Magneto while T-Ray is Sublime in the future.


    5. Is Deadpool the reason Rhino is missing his main horn whenever he shows up now?


    6. No, the Punisher punched off his horn.


    7. One thing I do quite like about how Dillon drew Deadpool is how he looks unmasked. I’ve been kinda underwhelmed by how a lot of artist’s draw Deadpool’s face, I’ve always liked it to look genuinely revolting, so that you don’t just look and think “that’s disgusting”, but actually feel it too, and there’s something about the way Dillon drew it that suggested the flesh had a mangled shape that helped achieve that.
      Also, his expression when that woman shows concern and tells him to go see a doctor is sort of touching.


    8. Hm, I wonder if anyone’s going to be so dumb that he’ll skim this page and think that the ten best Deadpool moments are all cover images.

      Yeah. I almost did. XP


    9. #15, one of my favorite moments. Thought I’d mention though – it may have been ripped off in Spider-Man & Human Torch, but Deadpool ripped it off from The Spot’s infamous first appearance in Spectacular Spider-Man #99-100. He tells Spider-Man that he’s called The Spot and the Web-Head proceeds to spend 9 panels breaking down in a fit of laughter.