Batgirl #10 Play-by-Play

May 18th, 2010 by | Tags: ,

Click ’em if you got ’em.

We start with Calculator’s creepy-ass monologuing to his dead son.  He talks about killing the hell out of  a bunch of the Teen Titans in a way which makes me glad that David isn’t reading this book because he’d be getting that look in his eyes that speaks of exactly how much he could say if he weren’t being kind to the DC person near him.  Just leave the recapping to me, Calcy.

Instead he hands it off to Oracle, who talks about how much trouble Calculator caused the Birds and how she ‘took his daughter away from him,’ the last of which never happened, and seriously guys, leave it to me.  That’s why I get paid the . . . you know what?  Just take over.

Oracle is dismantling the O-cave (no snickering!) while talking to Stephanie.  Stephanie is doing the usual superhero routine – saving women in peril.  Some hookers are being threatened by a biker gang.  She demolishes the biker gang, but she by the time she’s finished, Oracle has declared radio silence and left the cave.

Batgirl’s not the only one looking for Oracle.  Detective Nick is entering Professor Gordon’s office and poking around.  He finds a ‘Batgirl Defuses Bomber’ clipping, with a picture of the ill-fated Johnny C from last month.

Stephanie walks in and catches him, and I have to hand it to Lee Garbett and Pere Perez, the look on his face is priceless.  Not too over-stated, not cartoony, but funny as hell all the same.

Stephanie runs through a bunch of lines in her head, one of which is ‘you smell nice,’ which ha!  One month without Tim or that obnoxious guy from the last story, and you’re already on the prowl, Stephanie?  Good for you.  Right back on the horse.  (It’s just gonna be one of those recaps.  I can’t help it.)

Stephanie bonds with him over the guy who jumped to his death last issue, and they seem to get along, but she learns he’s into Barbara and not into teenagers, and yes, that’s a good thing.

Wendy, Calculator’s daughter, is coming down to the O-cave, having followed Barbara and found some information online.  As soon as the gets in – it’s a trap!

An automated message plays, saying that Oracle has a reason to believe that her life is in danger.  “You’ll find food and water in the ‘secret’ kitchenette.”  Oracle is so hard-core, even her kitchenette is secret.  And her kitchen?  You don’t even want to know about that.  Just knowing where it was drove three Navy SEALS mad and made a chemist swallow his own tongue.  And no, you can’t use her bathroom.

Meanwhile, Calculator attaches whatever he was using to cyber-whammy people to a satellite dish and whammies all of Gotham.  Well played, jerk.  You’re still not seeing the kitchenette.

The students who were texting in Barbara’s class turn into cyber-zombies (that’s what you get, you iPhone-obsessed techno doofi) and come after her.  Stephanie jumps through the window in her batgirl suit and knocks them away.  They make it outside before the crowd overwhelms them.  Barbara tells Stephanie to run, as the zombie barf something on her that seems to freeze her in metal.

I.  I’m just not going to think about that.  Ever.  Ever again.

Stephanie starts fighting, but gets hit with . . . something.  She turns to see Man-Bat, Huntress, Catwoman, and other heroes attacking her and ends the issue with this priceless, considering how the recap has gone, quote.  “This is about as screwed as you get.”

Random Irrelevant Detail:  Barbara keeps a file of Batgirl clippings right there on her desk?  Given she set up Wendy to come into her cave and get trapped, maybe she set up Nick to come into her office and get interested?  Never put anything past Barbara.

Suckiness Advisory Warning:  Clear skies.  This is a solid story.

Overall Awesomeness Level:  Zombies.  A shout-out to Johnny C.  Stephanie set up for a big win.  This keeps getting better.

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12 comments to “Batgirl #10 Play-by-Play”

  1. He talks about killing the hell out of a bunch of the Teen Titans in a way which makes me glad that David isn’t reading this book because he’d be getting that look in his eyes that speaks of exactly how much he could say if he weren’t being kind to the DC person near him.

    I’ve never been kind to any DC person :c00l:

  2. I’m so scared they’re building up Wendy to take Babs’ place in this book, with the solicits mentioning her “true destiny” and DC saying that Babs will be featured more in Birds of Prey. I don’t know how “The Adventures of Stephanie Brown and Some Titans That Got Mauled By Wonder Dog” will fare.

    But this all goes back to how it boggles my mind that Wendy has such a big part in this book in the first place. Out of all the characters that should be in a Batgirl book…

  3. @david brothers: And you have the badass smiley to prove it.

    @Nat: I have bad news for you then . . . that’s gonna happen. Which irritates me, too. Batman had four books a month when he was dead. But oh well.

  4. I still can’t build any enthusiasm for this iteration of Batgirl. Just looking at her, I find her so… incredibly… generic. Last Batgirl, you’d look at her and say “Wow! Freaky mute asian ninja monkey asskicker!” I look at Steph and it’s just… “Oh. That pretty blonde girl is a superhero.” Which makes her one of, what? 27? I mean, yeah, I’m judging based on appearances here but… damn, Cassie was better. What was DC’s problem with her, anyway? It seems like for as long as she was around, they were trying to get rid of her in some ham-fisted fashion or other. I just don’t see why she couldn’t have stuck around!

  5. I suppose Wendy as Kid Oracle, if it ends up working, will be one of those things where we don’t think too hard about where it came from. Like the Red Robin costume. Ignoring her ties to the Teen Titans and especially the abominable Wonder Dog story, Wendy is the daughter of a villain & wants to emulate his heroic counterpart (and also they’re both in wheelchairs). Not an inherently flawed premise, it’s all in how you handle it.

  6. @Steve: Yeah, but for me, I don’t understand why Miller has chosen to pursue this storyline and character as opposed to numerous more worthy storylines and characters. I guess it all goes back to how I’m still upset that the book acts like Cassandra was never Batgirl at all, and why use Wendy as opposed to someone who has a very strong link to the Batgirl legacy? It feels like he’s obligated to tie up loose ends from that lousy Oracle mini so that it wasn’t a total scam. But I don’t think anyone actually gives a damn about Wendy outside of Miller himself.

  7. @Nat: I kind of give a damn about Wendy. But I’m with you, man, I don’t know what the Hell she’s doing in this book.

  8. Hey, remember how it turned out that Bart Allen was never really supposed to last as “the” Flash, and was only really a placeholder until Johns could bring Barry, the One True Flash back? I mean, they even gave Bart his own series, all while they were secretly plotting to get rid of him.

    Just sayin’.

  9. @LaterComments: That be a swift kick in the guy, seein’ as those are the exact circumstances of Steph’s brief turn as Robin.

  10. Or rather “That would be a swift kick in the gut”

  11. I like swift kick in the guy better

  12. Maybe Bruce Wayne isn’t the only one getting back on his feet this year!

    Haters’ gotta hate, Didio’s gotta diddle.