Putting the Reign in Dark Reign?

June 27th, 2009 by | Tags: , , , , ,

A while back, there was that story about Gwen Stacy’s clone children. Originally, they were meant to be Peter’s, but it was overturned because Peter Parker having children of any kind would age him.

Joe Quesada decided that Peter Parker and Mary Jane should not be married anymore and that Peter should be single. One of his wafer-thin reasons was that Peter Parker being married would age him.

The whole idea about Mephisto retconning away their marriage was partially because Quesada definitely did not want the two of them to get a divorce. Why no divorce? You guessed it. It would age him.

My personal opinion is that no, none of these things would truly age the character. I mean, hell, Scarlet Witch has a father who survived the Holocaust, a brother with white hair and a full-grown daughter from another reality and she still seems plenty young. All that Spider-Man stuff mentioned above doesn’t totally age Peter. But you know what does?

Having an 8-year-old Danny Rand play with a Spider-Man action figure!

Let’s see… Danny is 8 in that sequence. The last year of his comic has made a big deal out of him being 33 now. Spider-Man started fighting crime at 15…

So there you have it. Spider-Man is at least 40-years-old! Looking pretty good for a guy that age. Soon he’ll be getting hair plugs and a shiny, new Spider-Mobile to deal with his spectacular middle age crisis. I wish him well.

Speaking of Iron Fist, that issue has a preview for Fat Cobra’s upcoming one-shot. It’s great already and I’m sure the final product will be brilliant. Fat Cobra is easily one of the best new characters from either of the big two in a long time.

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12 comments to “Putting the Reign in Dark Reign?”

  1. I’m still anxiously awaiting closure on that “Older Ultimate Fantastic Four” who never got any explanation as to why or how they existed.

  2. Alternative explanation: Spiderman plagiarized his costume from a toy line that was popular when both he and Danny were growing up.

  3. I still want to read the graphic where Spiderman is an old man and has to fight Venom once last time and Mary Jane died because Peter Parker has “radioactive spider sperm”. I’m not sure what it was called but it was recommend on G4.

  4. Also Alternative explanation: Time Travel.

  5. @sbryce: @sbryce: After a quick trip to google, the title of this post makes me sense since it is reference to the graphic novel I’m talking about…

  6. Y’know… they could have aged Spider-Man gracefully if both Ben Reiley and Mayday Parker survived. “Spider-Girl” should have been canon.

  7. If I had to guess, I’d put Scarlet Witch in her mid to late 30s, considerably older than I like Spider-Man. I’m one of the few on the internet who prefers a single Spider-Man–as a kid it really did make him less relatable to me. I actually stopped reading Spider-Man and started reading Nightwing and Robin when I discovered there were younger alternatives.

  8. @W4:

    You scare me.

  9. Oh, there is a simple explanation for this really.

    Quesada is an idiot.

  10. This is actually a tease for the Summer 2010 Event, “Legacy of the Spider-Mans”.

  11. […] Old Spider-Man is old… […]

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