Merry Christmas! We end our penultimate week on a day about Jesus being born, Barney getting his Pebbles, Pre-Crisis Dick Grayson laying an egg and me getting both a Spider-Man chalice and tickets to Spider-Man Musical Deathtrap 2011. God bless us, everyone!

Last we checked, Loki got run over by a reind–er, Thor. Now he appears to be at the Ultimates’ mercy… or is he?! Forgive the lack of punchlines as it’s almost entirely Loki talking here and we really needed to move the plot forward, verbally.

And another issue bites the dust. Thanks to ManiacClown for putting up with my absolutely horrible holiday retail schedule. We’ll be back soon for the conclusion of the Ultimate Holiday Wars. In the meantime, enjoy Iron Maiden doing a cover of a Gary Glitter Christmas song.

Hey, it’s Christmas Eve! Meaning we’re almost done here. For yesterday’s installment, Thor roughed up Iron Man pretty badly. Then Hela and Valkyrie hung out and left their pants at the door. Now it’s time for Thor vs. Loki.

Apologies to ManiacClown, who suggested a couple changes to me, but I kind of forgot what he said. So if this isn’t any good, it’s my fault. Tomorrow, we finish things off with a little more backstory.

Day Seven!

In our last installment, Thor knocked Captain America into the distance and got all solemn around Valkyrie’s corpse. Let’s see what Loki’s up to during all this.

Me and ManiacClown will continue to join forces tomorrow as Thor continues to be pissed off.

Day Four!
Day Five!
Day Six!
Day Seven!

The holiday special continues off of yesterday’s intro, where Thor returns from the dead to find Captain America dealing with the dead body of Valkyrie. The last line was, “I care not what Captain America says –” and I hope there’s at least one SNL fan out there who knows where this is going…

Thanks to ManiacClown for his help. Join us tomorrow as Thor is STILL pissed. I’m pretty much going to be saying that for the rest of the week, aren’t I? The issue is 90% “Thor is pissed off.”

Day Three!
Day Four!
Day Five!
Day Six!
Day Seven!

Welcome to a special holiday edition of New Ultimate Edit. Those of you paying attention may have noticed that Ultimate New Ultimates #4 came out two months ago. Due to scheduling conflicts, ManiacClown and I couldn’t get on it immediately like we’ve done with all the other Loeb/Ultimate stuff. As it took longer for us to get to it, we found that it brought sadness and annoyance to… well, nobody really. Not a single person noticed. Nobody cried foul or asked, “Hey, whatever happened to that thing you guys used to do?”

Not that I blame them. The whole thing has become moot. New Ultimates isn’t even that bad. I wouldn’t exactly call it good, but it lacks the apocalyptic, “How did this get made?!” horror that came from Ultimates 3 and especially Ultimatum. Plus Jeph Loeb has left comic writing behind, at least for the time being. Now he’s hanging out in Marvel’s animation division, meaning that the next issue of New Ultimates is his last.

Still, ManiacClown and I felt compelled to at least finish what we started. There are only two more issues left to cover, then we can lay the Ultimate Edit Trilogy to rest. Considering the holiday season kills my productivity due to having a retail job, this issue being a Thor-centric entry and our habit of writing Thor as Santa Claus, it came natural to save it for the week of Christmas. So here we are.

Let’s review, since it’s been a while. Issue one had the Defenders appear with superpowers. They proceeded to steal Mjolnir from Valkyrie and gave it to Loki. In the second issue, the Enchantress mind-controlled most of the women and had them beat up the more high-profile Ultimates as part of Loki’s master plan to conquer Earth. Then in the third issue, the low-profile Ultimates saved the day, Loki’s forces were shot an awful lot and Valkyrie’s death brought the return of a really pissed off Thor.

In tomorrow’s update: Thor is still pissed.

Day Two!
Day Three!
Day Four!
Day Five!
Day Six!
Day Seven!

First off, Halloween happened. That led to this.

Thankfully, I didn’t come across anyone dressed as Lawrence Taylor or Major Payne.

Now to panels. This week I’m joined by Space Jawa. There are other kinds of Jawas?

Action Comics #894
Paul Cornell, Pete Woods, Nick Spencer and RB Silva

Avengers #6
Brian Michael Bendis and John Romita Jr.

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A year ago I talked to David Brothers about an idea I had for the site. I had tried writing reviews of weekly releases before, but I never got into it. There were a couple reasons and they’re both about redundancies. I can tell you about how great the latest issue of Captain America is, but so will every other site. There are so many other comic sites that will give better reviews of new stuff that I don’t know why anyone would give a damn what I have to say among all that. Then there’s the fact that comic quality doesn’t change so often within the series’ run. If I tell you that Captain America is great one month, chances are it’s going to be just as good the next. Why waste my breath? If I want to give you my opinions, I want it to at least be interesting and hopefully unique.

I thought back to the first issue of the Agents of Atlas miniseries from several years back. The general response of people who read it and tried to push it was to point out that there’s a scene where a 1950’s robot runs down a hallway while carrying a talking gorilla and that gorilla is firing four uzis with his hands and feet. I figured that maybe that could be the unique way to cover the comics of the week. I’d settle on one panel that really pushes what the comic is about, more than often more than the cover does. It’s no longer so much a review as it is giving you a gist on what we all read. At the same time, I would make sure not to have any major spoilers. If the comic has Wolverine beat up Daken in the climax, then I won’t show it. I will, on the other hand, show them about to fight it out.

If anything, it was also an excuse to keep me from straying from doing anything for the site too long at a time. I’d have a deadline of some point every Sunday and I’ve been pretty good on that. I’ve only delayed two weeks and those were because of a lengthy power outage and the loss of my computer.

I didn’t know if it would work, but David said to go for it. Now it’s been a year and I thought it would be fun to do an extra installment in a retrospective form. The idea was to pick one of my favorite panels from the previous 52 weeks, but with the challenge of not double-dipping from the same title at any point. Here we go!

Adventure Comics #4
Geoff Johns, Sterling Gates and Jerry Ordway

Amazing Spider-Man #617
Joe Kelly, Max Fiumara and Javier Pulido

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Due to extenuating circumstances, I wasn’t able to do ThWiP last week, so it’s been accumulated into this week’s update. For last week’s picks, I’m disappointed in David for choosing that specific Avengers Academy panel when the true honors should have gone to Reptil asking a disgruntled Cain Marko if he can say, “Nothing can stop the Juggernaut!” for his amusement. Was Taters rejoins the show once again, unable to choose between panels for Superman/Batman, so we went with both.

Warning: there is something really fucked up going on with Hal Jordan’s hands in the Legacies image and you won’t be able to stop yourself from staring at it.

Action Comics #892
Paul Cornell, Pete Woods, Pere Perez, Jeff Lemire and Pier Gallo

Age of Heroes #4
Elliott Kalan, Brendan McCarthy and others

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-Ouch, this weekend was a b-word.
-So this p-word is going up with minimal shownotes.
-Sidekick Shodown!
-Esther’s rolling with the Robins.
-David has Captain America’s henchboy turned cyborg assassin turned shield slinger.
-6th Sense’s 4a.m. Instrumental for the theme music.
-See you, space cowboy!

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Welcome to a very special Too Much Goddamn Deadpool Edition of ThWiP. Why too much? Even though I didn’t even read Wade Wilson’s War this time around? Simply put, Deadpool #1000 has way too much going for it for me to choose a single panel, so I figured I’d give a spot to all eleven of its stories. Adding that to an already stacked week and we have a hefty set.

Avengers Prime #2
Brian Michael Bendis and Alan Davis

Avengers: The Origin #5
Joe Casey and Phil Noto

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